Listen, sex drives are great, but they’re not always reliable. Rarely are we even really at the wheel. The fact is that our sex drives fluctuate day to day. Sometimes, we might have a higher-than-usual sex drive even though we’re not particularly interested in hooking up with anyone. On other days, our sex drive might be super low, despite the fact that we definitely want to get it on with a partner. But while our sex drive might be unpredictable from time to time, it doesn’t mean we can’t still be the one driving the car. There are ways to get horny even when our sex drive wants to take a backseat. So, if we’re in the mood — but our body isn’t — we can employ certain techniques to sync up our body and mind. These techniques involve learning how to get horny, fast.
Try these tried-and-true ways to get in the mood.
1. Watch a spicy scene from a movie, show, or music video
Have a favorite sex scene? Put in on! Or maybe you know that FKA Twigs pole routine music video for “Cellophane” really does it for you. Watch it! Visual stimuli, especially if it has a tantalizing plot, or a favorite actor, can really help to get you squirming in your jeans, in a good way. That’s because desire often happens simply as a response to stimuli.
2. Listen to erotica or audio porn
There has been a recent boom in audio porn, making your options bountiful. No matter your gender, sexual orientation, and sexual preferences, you’re bound to find something that turns you on.
3. Watch porn that turns you on
If you know you like porn and have a favorite go-to porn site) or a specific video in mind, put it onPorn can really get your gears going.
4. Wear something that makes you feel sexy
Slipping into something that makes you feel sexy, can be an instant mood-changer. You know the feeling, that, “well damn, I look so good, I WOULD DO ME” feeling? That might mean getting all done up and putting on your favorite underwear. It might mean wearing that vegan-leather o-ring collar you just bought. It might mean throwing on those “fuck me” boots that have been sitting in your closet for ages, or wearing that packer you finally bought! Whatever makes YOU feel the best, put it on.
5. Exchange some dirty sexts
What better way to get yourself revved up for the night ahead than having a raunchy text exchange with your partner ahead of time? Get explicit, talk about all the things you want to do to them, and that you can’t wait to have them do to you, and have them do the same. Anticipation is the name of the game, baby.
6. Have phone sex
Are you more of an aurally stimulated person? Upgrade your sexting exchange for some good old fashion phone sex, with a consenting partner of course. Tell your partner what you’re wearing, what you aren’t wearing — whatever you want! No time to invest in a full-blown phone sex sesh? Send voice memos back and forth.
7. Take nudes or sultry pics
Maybe you’re REALLY feeling yourself in that outfit you put on. Why not take it a step further and document it? Even if you don’t send them to anyone, the thought of doing it and having a partner get turned on at the sight of you can be oh-so-tantalizing.
8. Hit up a sex shop with a partner
If you’re looking for a date idea that can double as play, well then this is your ticket. Visiting a fun, inclusive, sex-positive sex shop not only gets you thinking about sex, but it’s a great way to have open communication about your specific desires and (possible) kinks. Sex shop employees are also there to answer your questions and possibly give you guidance. Whether or not you end up taking home a pleasure product (or a few), you’ll have sex on the brain.
9. Browse online for sex toys
You can do this alone or with a partner. Pull up your favorite ethical sex toy shop, and browse away. Look through the different toys you think you’d want to try out, the bondage items, maybe the latex clothing, whatever suits you, until you’re squirming in your seat.
10. Break a sweat
That’s right! A nice refreshing workout can boost your libido. Exercise increases your circulation and blood flow, which both contribute to higher sex drive. Doing exercise that you enjoy can also lower stress, which is great because we know that stress can really put a damper on desire. So, if you’ve got the time, hit the gym for 30 minutes, go on a brisk walk, or have a mini solo dance party at your place!
11. Queue up a sultry playlist
If you’re the type of person who hears the lyrics “my neck, my back” and immediately start to grind in your seat, you might want to consider putting together a playlist of your favorite songs that get you in the mood, to have on hand whenever you need a little extra motivation. Speaking of, why not throw Normani’s “Motivation” in there just thinking about the music video is starting to turn us on!
If arousal is what you WANT, these tips are sure to help you wet your sexual whistle. Now get out there and get horny!
